Monday, September 02, 2013

Happy Menarche!

I have *one* daughter.
I like parties.
I believe in celebrating the milestones -

That can only leave one obvious outcome . . . .

Drumroll please . . .


A menarche is a girls first period.  And where I was thinking something with lots of chocolate and a small selection of her female friends . .
Nevertheless, when doing research and asking questions I found some interesting ideas - and some that I'm NOT going to do . . .

Like the uterine piñata
Although - this could be kinda fun . . make the uterus feel a bit of the pain you do  . . . yeah.  Where is that stick again?  Oh - and as pull string piñata then at the other end of the string could be a TAMPON? . . . HAHAHA!  Ok.  no.

 And this little snuggly.

It's cute - just not what I'd want to get all snuggly with.  But that may just be me.

And then for cake?  I don't care to eat a uterus . .  . blah.

This - on the other hand - just made me laugh.  Pin the ovaries on the uterus game . . . .Oh My!

A tiara?  
Red dress? 
If she was up for it.  
Sash declaring her Miss Menstruation? 

Maybe you've got some other ideas?

Friday, August 23, 2013

The Poop Smear Endever

How we end up with poop smears  . . . *shake head*

We are well beyond the diaper and exploratory poop days.  You mothers know what I'm talking about.

Nevertheless, in my house we have a mystery poop smear-er.
No one admits to it - although I have my suspects.

Lately the kids have been using my bathroom when they have a perfectly nice, mostly clean, bathroom of their own. And today I saw a SMEAR!  Oh! the indignities! right on the back of my rim! Still, it was in such a place that you could, with just a little care - do your business and leave it there.

Because of course since it isn't MY smear - the mystery smear person should take responsibility . . . yada yada yada . . .

Come now to the book I'm reading, A Year of Biblical Womanhood. In chapter 4 author Rachel Evans grapples with the Proverbs 31 woman of the Bible.  At first it was an overwhelming task list that she was completely failing at . . .until she talked to a Jewess - who told her that Proverbs 31 isn't a to do list but a blessing . . .  A spoken blessing to speak to ladies.
"I looked into this, and sure enough, in Jewish culture it is not the women who memorize Proverbs 31, but the men.  Husbands commit each line of the poem to memory, so they can recite it to their wives at the Sabbath meal, usually in a song.". . .  
""It's like their version of 'You go, girl!" I explained to Dan [her husband] at the dinner table that night, . . ."" 
" . . . the woman described in Proverbs 31 is not some ideal that exists out there; she is present in each one of us when we do even the smallest things with valor."  
What a difference that puts on Proverbs 31, eh?!  But it certainly resonated with me . . . especially the "even the smallest things" . . . cause the smallest things are what keep me going at all!

My husband is of the old school (as was my Grandmother, so I hear) of the "If you can't do something right, don't do it at all." Where as I have a magnet on my fridge that says "If you can't do something right, AT LEAST DO SOMETHING!" . . . hehe.  Love it.

This blessing "eshet chayil" - literally 'woman of valor' - is a blessing that this gal pours over us mamas all the time!  And if you are a mom, you need to be reading her blog or facebook or whatever because she is funny, and real, and encouraging and she will tell you you are a superhero and keep your cape on cause we have  one more poop smear to wipe up and if that poop smear gets on your tattered cape you are all that much more awesome for it.

Fast forward to later today - and I visit my bathroom.  The smear is STILL THERE.  And I know my hubby has used the commode, not to mention the other kids . . . *sigh* and now the smear is probably hard and crusty . . .

Yes.  I know.  I did ignore it - probably first.  I did set up precedence . . . but I was hoping . . .

No magic happened in our house today. So I gather my mama cape and got out the cleaning agent and a handful of toilet paper and took care of that smear. And Felt Victorious! Woman of Valor! Because even the smallest things count.

Every small thing counts.

I didn't take a picture to accompany this post, cause there was a little cache of suspicious yellow looking stuff pooled on the back of the commode with some random hair and fuzz which I left for another day.

Another act of VALOR!

 Eshet chayil!

Sunday, June 09, 2013

Way way way to early

I don't know how my friend does this, but she can wake - DOES wake up like 4 or 5 am *naturally* every day.


Not me.

But since I woke about 3:30 today and battled going to sleep until about 4am - I'd thought I'd start my day. Because after all - SHE was awake - right?

She had already started her day - mayhaps I should try it, eh?

Pues - no.

Not for me, thankyouverymuch.

I'm ready to go back to bed.